Friday, April 22, 2011

Pwemed: Portal Edition

Greetings, beatniks.


Grab a cappuccino, crack open your composition book and pull up a stool in front of the open mic. We are gathered to celebrate the release of Portal 2—sequel to Valve's brilliant first-person puzzler—with a series of "pwems" dedicated to this beloved franchise.

To mark the occasion, I’ve trudged through the depths of my own inner-turmoil and despair, bouncing between portals of thought to navigate my way through the subconscious (hey, is my beret on straight?) in order find the most appropriate literary vessel for our subject. I figured, Portal is a short game. The premise is simple (GTFO!), but it's hardly a shallow game experience.

So how does one capture this essence in a poem? The dirty limerick seemed to lack a certain drama, so I went with my second choice. Ladies and gents, for your reading pleasure, five Portal haikus haiki haiku after the jump.


First Encounter
human test subject
finds a weighted companion
GLaDOS to meet you

Automated Turret
incinerate me
when I shoot, you knock me down
I do not blame you

speedy thing goes in
existential dilemma
speedy thing comes out

falling head over
mechanized heel springs for you
sweet companion cube

Black Forest
endless testchambers
tweak your morality core
I am still alive
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